Appropriate Literature for Your Man Cave

These three publications came in the mail. Which do you open first?

Great literature all. Especially Modern Drunkard with it's amazing writing and great subjects. It comes along about twice a year now.  Frontgate is a dumb catalog of junk made in China. Including that awful Jimmy Buffet's  line of 'Margaritaville'  forced-good-times party stuff. All banned in your Man Cave except when found for free, broken on the curb and then as gag material. Fun to stomp to pieces in a booze fueled frenzy. The Old West auction catalog making a case for a Colt Single Action as The Actual Gun That Shot a Famous Guy is a test of anyones marketing prowess. 

Flipping through the pages of Frontgate things get worse, a fake antiqued tiki bar is pretty stupid. After about 3 grand for a flimsy bar, stools and a whopping $100 for each cushon, chances are you'll be having your Mai-Tais alone.

By the way this guy is never, ever invited anywhere. The girl, maybe. Although she seems way too excited about a beach ball.

This stuff is more like it and carries The Good Housekeeping Man Cave Seal of Approval.